It looms closer

The train is gaining speed, graduation is looming closer and closer, I feel like time and space are flying by and like I am a passenger on a train that is about to crash off a bridge. this wheel is fastly coming to an abrupt stop, and I might spin out in to nothingness

In little more than a month I will have to wake up and join the “real” world.  But what if I am not ready to wake up? 

Have I cherished this time? Have I used it to the best of my ability?

how I wish I had the faith my mother has

I sit here in my studio on Tuesday afternoon, 36 hours of no sleep and contemplating my future. Plan A failed I was not accepted to the next elimination round of teach for america. I wonder how many of us there are who were rejected? I’m not bitter, well maybe a little, I’ll get over it though. I have bigger and better options to look forward too and other teaching opportunities to find.

When I told my mom she was disappointed, well I was too, she told me to pray about other options. Pray. This is something I have not done in 5 years plus probably. It seems to me, as she gets older her faith that god will provide grows, and as I get older my faith continually fails me. I don’t know where I stand on this idea of an all powerful being. I was raised christian, I accepted Christ when I was 14(?) and now I am 22, worldly and lost in thought on the whole god issue. I can’t reject my upbringing, the morals and values that where instilled, but at the same time these values go with being a good person and being a cooperative member of society. 

I know I have been fortunate. I have been given opportunities that others have not and I question were those opportunities given to me through divine providence or because I earned them. I know my life has a path. Is it one laid out for me like the bible says or it is lady fortuna blessing me? 

I feel something, I feel it every time I listen to joyful music, and I feel it every time I see an amazing piece of art. I feel it every time I walk into some thing considered scared. A peaceful quiet.  But what is it? Is it god calling me? even though he knows I will fail, again and again and again? It has been a long time since I have felt a solid connection to god, let alone like anyone was listening when I prayed. 

So I don’t know……I am 22, and lost, scared to death of what awaits me.

Flocon de Neige

I recently installed Flocon de Neige at the library, please go see it, it will be up through the beginning of feburary. Flocon de Neige means snowflake in french. Statement and gallery below

 

Flocon de Neige is an installation currently on display at the Kansas City Art Institute’s Jannes Library. The piece consists of five hundred individual snowflakes that are cut from thin porcelain patterned slabs. The installation is suspended in the window, so the viewer may observe the effect the snowflakes have on their environment. Light is a significant component to this piece. As the sun shines through the windows and the day progresses from light to dark, the elements of Flocon de Neige reveal their translucency and cast shadows.

  

its almost over

its been forever since i updated this thing! anywho my life got pretty crazy after midterms. below are some pics from midterm the snowflake piece I was beginning to work on which now has become a major installation installed at the Jannas Library! I fired so many kilns this semester too. I became quite efficient at firing byrd to cone 10 as well as the bada bing soda kiln.

me bumping the gas on byrd

OMG OBAMA!

UPDATE: OMG Obama WON! I, I….I have no words to describe how I feel other than perpetually happy, glee filled and overwhelmed with joy and pride! Obama is my president and I helped pick him! I think my heart might explode………………

Missouri is a 50/50 split I wonder if this has ever happened before?

 

this quite possibly is the most exciting night of my life thus far, I can’t believe I get to be apart of this to be able to watch this!